New Nintendo controller patent application: #0003

Here’s another new patent application for our series of new Wii controllers, fresh off the drafting board (read: the A5 scrap paper I stole from work).

This week, other Wii controller developers have been targeting the music game genre, but we’ve taken a different tack.

People love sports games, right? EA have proven this to us time and time again. But people also like a sense of danger to make things that little bit more exciting, right? Well that’s what we’re aiming aim with this new patent application:

Model# ILI-026: The Wiimote Jai Alai Xistera

Say goodbye to your loved ones!

The game of Pelota can trace it’s origins back to 13th century Greece, but it is these days better known as Jai Alai. This high velocity wall-and-ball game is most recognisable for it’s scoop-shaped racquet, or “xistera”. A typical xistera can propel a ball anywhere up to 300kmp/h, meaning the aim of Jai Alai is just as often about not getting brained as it is about scoring a point.

Well we’re bringing this exciting, fast-paced and dangerous sport indoors where (theoretically at least) it’s safe. A MotionPlus enabled Wiimote is clamped to the back of the Wiimote Jai Alai Xistera’s wristguard (see Fig. 1), where it can keep track of the full range of motion. Players are served an in-game ball which they must catch and fling as hard a possible. They then use the clamped Wiimote’s D-Pad to move their player around the court. Failure to catch a ball on it’s rebound loses you a point, failure to dodge a rebounding ball results in a game ending trip to Wii-hospital.

Because of the range of motion required from a typical Jai Alai throw (see Fig. 2), use of the Wiimote Jai Alai Xistera has been refused for people in the following situations:

• People aged under 11
• People aged over 55
• People with freely mobile toddlers
• People with freely mobile or habitat specific pets, ie; dogs, cats, fish, ferrets, budgies, parrots, venemous snakes, frogs, etc…
• People who live in apartments
• People who rent
• People under the influence of alcohol
• People under the influence of sugar
• People who are currently without contents insurance

Because saftey is our paramount concern, the Wiimote Jai Alai Xistera’s wristguard comes bundled with the Nintendo Wii Wriststrap+ Leather Bracer, to help reduce the chance of serious personal injury … slightly.

Waluigi is a sporting prodigy

The controller comes bundled with the newly released Super Mario: Waluigi’s Castle Brix Breaker, the first title in the Mario canon to be based primarily on Luigi’s evil counterpart. In the game, described by developers as “the spiritual successor to Mario Tennis and Arkanoid“, players control Waluigi as he hurls bombs into the walls of Princess Peach’s castle. By progressively breaking down walls, Waluigi can capture the Six Random Valuable Items (which are presumed to be terribly important, and yet no-one has ever heard of them before).

Bonus rounds pit Waluigi against the Princess’ castle moats, timing how long it takes to scoop out enough water to cross safely. While these sections of the game were, typically, added as an afterthought in the hope of adding variation to an otherwise one-action controller, they do still manage to be just as dangerous to bystanders.

The Wiimote Jai Alai Xistera was slated for release in the first quarter of the new year, but has since been postponed to the second quarter of 2010.

Note: This peripheral is Wii Vitality Sensor compatible … mostly so emergency services can discover at what time you suffered the accident that ended your life.

< See the previous patent application | See the next patent application >